Paddle Your Own Canoe
One Man's Fundamentals for Delicious Living
(Sprache: Englisch)
Parks and Recreation actor and Making It co-host Nick Offerman shares his humorous fulminations on life, manliness, meat, and much more in this New York Times bestseller.
Growing a perfect moustache, grilling red meat, wooing a woman-who better to...
Growing a perfect moustache, grilling red meat, wooing a woman-who better to...
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Parks and Recreation actor and Making It co-host Nick Offerman shares his humorous fulminations on life, manliness, meat, and much more in this New York Times bestseller.Growing a perfect moustache, grilling red meat, wooing a woman-who better to deliver this tutelage than the always charming, always manly Nick Offerman, best known as Parks and Recreation's Ron Swanson? Combining his trademark comic voice and very real expertise in woodworking-he runs his own woodshop-Paddle Your Own Canoe features tales from Offerman's childhood in small-town Minooka, Illinois-"I grew up literally in the middle of a cornfield"-to his theater days in Chicago, beginnings as a carpenter/actor and the hilarious and magnificent seduction of his now-wife Megan Mullally. It also offers hard-bitten battle strategies in the arenas of manliness, love, style, religion, woodworking, and outdoor recreation, among many other savory entrees.
A mix of amusing anecdotes, opinionated lessons and rants, sprinkled with offbeat gaiety, Paddle Your Own Canoe will not only tickle readers pink but may also rouse them to put down their smart phones, study a few sycamore leaves, and maybe even hand craft (and paddle) their own canoes.
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1Not-So-Little House on the Prairie
Jesus, Mary, and Joseph. Where do I begin chapter 1? I suppose we ll do a chronological thing and start you off with some of the early years, a taste of the vintage stuff.
I showed up on Earth, in the tri-county area of Illinois, to be more precise, in 1970. This was, reportedly, the year Tom Waits showed up in LA to start pushing his demos around town. I haven t had the chance to ask Tom if he was trying to send me a personal message of serendipity with his beautiful and haunting songs of the day like Grapefruit Moon and Midnight Lullaby, but it seems too crazy-on-the-nose to just be coincidence. Right?
Somewhere in the Arizona desert, Tom Laughlin was shooting the movie Billy Jack, and warlock-style wax albums were dropping all about the realm with names like Look-Ka Py Py; Black Sabbath; Sex Machine; Moondance; Bitches Brew; The Man Who Sold the World; After the Gold Rush; Free Your Mind . . . and Your Ass Will Follow; Kristofferson, for cryin out loud; Let It Be; and the most weirdly kabbalistic Randy Newman s 12 Songs. Potent magicks coalesced and fluctuated across the void, whilst strange nether-clouds swelled with great portent above the green crop fields, awaiting . . . what? Some child? A chosen man-cub?
Despite some loose popular misconceptions, I did NOT in fact drop from my mother s womb wielding a full moustache and a two-headed battle-axe. Nor was there sighted evidence of even the first follicle of the first hair of my chest bracken. Those laurels would come later.
The luckiest part of my very lucky life (pre-Megan) has been being raised by my family in the environment they created for the rearing of my siblings and me. My mom, Catherine Ann Offerman (née Roberts), and my dad, Frederic Dames Offerman, grew up about three miles from each other in the middle of the countryside, outside of Minooka, Illinois. Where is that? Right next to Channahon, as I like to joke. (I told you
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this shit was gwine to be humorous.) Southwest of Joliet. My mom grew up in a family of four kids, born to Mike and Eloise Roberts, and they raised pigs, soybeans, and corn. My dad, born to Raymond Offerman and Marilyn Dames Offerman, grew up on a dairy farm with two siblings before moving into town as a teenager. They attended all the same Minooka schools that I eventually did, and married young. Dad was twenty-four and Mom was nineteen. Which seems batshit crazy to me these days.
Minooka is, surprisingly, only about an hour from Lake Shore Drive in Chicago, if there s no traffic. But it seems like it s fifty years distant, or at least it did in my youth. It was very bucolic and idyllic, like American Graffiti or Happy Days. Saturday night you would get together and buzz the gut in your jalopy, which meant drive past the five businesses on Main Street. At the time I was growing up the population was 768. It s grown ridiculously it s up near twelve thousand now. It used to be primarily a farming community, but by now, the commuting suburban population has reached it and subsumed it. There are now many inhabitants of Minooka whom I would consider soft, and yes, that is a judgment.
My dad went to Illinois State University. I had always heard various legends of his prowess as an athlete as a young man, primarily in baseball and basketball. I wrote to him, asking for some facts on this subject for my book, because he has always been pretty humble about it to the point of being mum. Here is an excerpt of his reply:
Well, I don t know what you heard but remember it was a ver
Minooka is, surprisingly, only about an hour from Lake Shore Drive in Chicago, if there s no traffic. But it seems like it s fifty years distant, or at least it did in my youth. It was very bucolic and idyllic, like American Graffiti or Happy Days. Saturday night you would get together and buzz the gut in your jalopy, which meant drive past the five businesses on Main Street. At the time I was growing up the population was 768. It s grown ridiculously it s up near twelve thousand now. It used to be primarily a farming community, but by now, the commuting suburban population has reached it and subsumed it. There are now many inhabitants of Minooka whom I would consider soft, and yes, that is a judgment.
My dad went to Illinois State University. I had always heard various legends of his prowess as an athlete as a young man, primarily in baseball and basketball. I wrote to him, asking for some facts on this subject for my book, because he has always been pretty humble about it to the point of being mum. Here is an excerpt of his reply:
Well, I don t know what you heard but remember it was a ver
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Autoren-Porträt von Nick Offerman
Nick Offerman
Bibliographische Angaben
- Autor: Nick Offerman
- 2014, 352 Seiten, Masse: 13,9 x 20,8 cm, Kartoniert (TB), Englisch
- Verlag: NAL
- ISBN-10: 0451467094
- ISBN-13: 9780451467096
- Erscheinungsdatum: 12.08.2015
Sprache:
Englisch
Pressezitat
Praise for Paddle Your Own Canoe[Offerman] not only explores his Paul Bunyan like image with tongue-in-cheek lessons on manliness, complete with illustrations and advice, but also offers poignant memories of his childhood growing up in Illinois and hilarious anecdotes from his career. Entertainment Weekly
Offerman touches on everything from his days as a break-dancing, football-playing farm boy in Minooka (about 50 miles southwest of the Loop) to his freewheeling, hedonistic 20s in Chicago to the inevitable Hollywood struggles that followed. But he doesn t gloss over embarrassing moments, including his two trips to jail during college at the University of Illinois one for shoplifting Ronnie Milsap cassettes from Kmart as a joke; the other, he says, a convoluted case of mistaken identity. Between anecdotes, he delivers impassioned pleas and rants Chicago magazine
Thought-provoking, profane, and frequently hilarious getting to know Offerman through his stumbling courtship with Megan Mullally and Kabuki theater training is well worth the price of admission. Publishers Weekly
Ron Swanson is a mustachioed, breakfast-food-loving, woodworking red-meat connoisseur. Nick Offerman is a mustachioed, breakfast-food-loving, woodworking red-meat connoisseur but, more important, also a real person a grateful, gracious, bemused actor in love with his wife, Megan Mullally, and the earnest simplicity of his not-so-Hollywood existence. Not only does he recall his life, but he also offers chuckle-worthy anecdotes, diagrams, even a haiku (about what else? bratwurst) to help his readers find their own ways toward delicious living. Ron Swanson would be proud. Booklist
Equal parts memoir and advice for grabbing life by the gonads. It s funny, highly nostalgic, and will make you seriously contemplate taking up carpentry. It s sort of like reading Garrison Keillor if he wrote for Playboy it s fun, it s visceral, and I learned things. When I finished the tome I
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had to take a long walk to soak everything in. We should all be so lucky to one day drink with this man, or at least purchase a table from him. ManCave Daily
Offerman s funny advice book offers practical tips about living more successfully, with the sort of dry and laconic delivery that comes through in his role on Parks and Recreation. Time Out New York
Uniquely honest and consistently hilarious Fans of Offerman may not be surprised by his candor, however this book is not specifically written for the fans. [It] will be enjoyed by many, specifically those who have the capacity and the will to wonder, and to want more out of life, while maintaining a degree of simplicity and happiness; just like Nick Offerman. Rare
A hilarious walkabout teeming with tasteful vulgarity, self-deprecating hilarity and a most humble wisdom bordering on sage-like. It s rare to find a memoir that is all at once touching, funny as sh*t, and capable of schooling you in basic modi operandi: like not being a total ass Newcity Lit
Offerman is a funny man But what is special about Paddle Your Own Canoe is the ability it gives Offerman to reveal himself as more than just the character he plays. He believes, and has always believed, in nonconformity. He believes in humility, honesty, hard work, and loyalty values he attributes to his parents and two favorite teachers. He believes those qualities are what truly define manliness, but that any person, regardless of gender, should aspire to them. Paddle Your Own Canoe is a delight. TheManual.com
You don t have to be able to properly work a table saw (I can t) or be in the market for a custom-made chair (I m not) to buy what Parks and Recreation star/woodshop owner Nick Offerman is selling in his memoir [a] modulated and admirable concept of what it means to live well and be a man. Offerman writes hilariously and honestly about boyhood chores and collegiate shenanigans, Chicago theater dues-paying and sobbing for, like, 20 minutes when receiving the call about landing the Parks and Rec job [he] offers a vivid look at how he charted the course for real happiness. It s nothing if not inspiring. RedEyeChicago
Offerman s funny advice book offers practical tips about living more successfully, with the sort of dry and laconic delivery that comes through in his role on Parks and Recreation. Time Out New York
Uniquely honest and consistently hilarious Fans of Offerman may not be surprised by his candor, however this book is not specifically written for the fans. [It] will be enjoyed by many, specifically those who have the capacity and the will to wonder, and to want more out of life, while maintaining a degree of simplicity and happiness; just like Nick Offerman. Rare
A hilarious walkabout teeming with tasteful vulgarity, self-deprecating hilarity and a most humble wisdom bordering on sage-like. It s rare to find a memoir that is all at once touching, funny as sh*t, and capable of schooling you in basic modi operandi: like not being a total ass Newcity Lit
Offerman is a funny man But what is special about Paddle Your Own Canoe is the ability it gives Offerman to reveal himself as more than just the character he plays. He believes, and has always believed, in nonconformity. He believes in humility, honesty, hard work, and loyalty values he attributes to his parents and two favorite teachers. He believes those qualities are what truly define manliness, but that any person, regardless of gender, should aspire to them. Paddle Your Own Canoe is a delight. TheManual.com
You don t have to be able to properly work a table saw (I can t) or be in the market for a custom-made chair (I m not) to buy what Parks and Recreation star/woodshop owner Nick Offerman is selling in his memoir [a] modulated and admirable concept of what it means to live well and be a man. Offerman writes hilariously and honestly about boyhood chores and collegiate shenanigans, Chicago theater dues-paying and sobbing for, like, 20 minutes when receiving the call about landing the Parks and Rec job [he] offers a vivid look at how he charted the course for real happiness. It s nothing if not inspiring. RedEyeChicago
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