The Rules of Parenting: A Personal Code for Bringing Up Happy, Confident Children

they're good at 50 Learn to appreciate the qualities that remind you of someone else 51 Look for the similarities between you 52 Find qualities to admire in them 53 Let them be better than you 54 Their attitude is as important as their achievements 55 Keep your fears and insecurities to yourself 56 Mind your programming 57 Don't try to have a perfect child  Sibling Rules 58 Give them each other 59 Recognize that squabbling is healthy (within reason) 60 Teach them to sort out their own arguments 61 Work as a team 62 Let them entertain each other 63 Never compare children with each other 64 Different children need different rules 65 Don't have a favourite 66 Mix and match 67 Find each child's strengths  School Rules 68 Schooling isn't the same as education 69 School comes as a package 70 Fight your child's corner 71 Bullying is always serious 72 Teach them to stand up for themselves 73 Put up with friends of theirs you don't like 74 Remember you're their parent, not their teacher 75 Don't mollycoddle them 76 Let up the pressure 77 They have to live with their choices (and it's OK) 
Teenage Rules 78 Don't panic 79 Remember Newton's Third Law 80 Give them a voice 81 Don't look under the mattress 82 Running round after them doesn't help anybody 83 Don't stand in front of a speeding train 84 Yelling isn't the answer 85 Let them have the last word 86 Everything comes with strings 87 Show some respect for the things they care about 88 Adopt a healthy attitude to sex 
Crisis Rules 89 Don't use your kids as ammunition 90 Let them cope in their own way 91 Being younger doesn't necessarily speed everything up 92 The aftershock can last forever 93 Tell them what's going on 94 Teach them to fail successfully 95 It's better to agree than to be right 96 All of your actions speak louder than any of your words 97 Make sure they know they're priority no. 1 98 You can't fix everything  Grown-up Rules   99 Back off 100 Wait until they ask for advice 101 Treat them as adults 102 Don't try to be their best friend 103 Encourage them regardless 104 You can't choose who your children love 105 Leave the strings off 106 Don't guilt-trip them 107 Remember they still need you 108 It's not your fault 109 Once a parent, always a parent 
Rules about your parents 1 Don't put them on a pedestal 2 Let them be grandparents 3 Don't ask too much of them 4 Don't guilt-trip them even by mistake 5 Learn to share 6 They're new to this too 7 Understand that they don't come from the same place as you 8 Any grandparent is better than no grandparent 9 Don't bad-mouth them in front of the kids 10 They love you just like you love your kids